Sunday, August 21, 2011

Ethan I hope you are proud~~!!

Hi my baby boy, missing you as always but especially at night when everyone is in bed and i am here to think of you. you and what you should be doing , i should be getting ready to send you to 4 year old preschool, but your cancer robbed me of that. I watch at how excited your "sissy" is getting to go to 3 year old preschool.

I hope you and kadie are together having fun being cancer free pain free and just being regular kids together. hoping you are both having wonderful dinners together. Baby boy that was so hard going to kadies viewing and funeral but i know you were with me and i was able to be there for kadies mommy sarah~~~

Getting ready to do some great things in your memory~~first thing i am going to disneyworld to do a 1/2 marathon (i am walking not running) in your memory and all fundraising goes to calebs crusade. i am starting to train and hope to lose some of this weight put on by my ways of coping with your death, no more coke to drink and no more bags of chocolate. and then tomorrow we are having a meeting bringing curesearch here to pittsburgh, a walk we will do in october. i am doing all of this for you. if i can help one person by doing all that i do i will feel i made a difference. like i always said "i will fight for childhood cancer until the day i leave this earth".

i am going to try to go to bed now, i love you more than chocolate and that is alot,
love always your mommy forever~~!!!


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