Ethan Bug's Blog: I miss you, someday we will be together again~~~

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I miss you, someday we will be together again~~~

Ethan I went to the cemetary today, i took an angel statue (it is a little boy angel very cute), a memory rock, pinwheel (blue your favorite color), flowers and a cars balloon. I sat and cried about how much i miss you and want to be with you, but I guess daddy and sarah need me too~~~Andreas had there finale fundraiser for your all day today, they made quite a bit of money for your trust fund. Daddy was on tv thanking everybody for there support and talking about what happened since sept 1 and how much we miss you, i was crying. Sissy was talking to your mud puddle picture today, saying brother i love you, and now she says "hold" to me and puts her arms up, i think you taught her to do that silly boy~~~today i went back to bed after being up for 1 hour, i just wanted to lay and think about you and what we would be doing today and even in the future. Well we are suspossed to be going to the pens game on thursday night, we will wave your pens towel and you favorite crosby shirt, i still remember our special valentines date to the pens game, your loved watching the hockey, eating the food and being with your mommy~~~tomorrow i am taking pappy to your gravesite, i am sure we will shed some tears together he misses you so very much~~~well going to go try to sleep, sleep with the angels baby boy, i love you

MORE THAN CHOCOLATE!!

Love always, mommy

4 comments:

UnknownApril 20, 2010 at 8:15 PM
Sweetie my heart breaks for you.. I read your stuff with tears falling from my eyes and wish I could just hug you and tell you what an awesome mom you are to Ethan and Andrea..
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supahmommy- somethin's wrong with that girlApril 20, 2010 at 8:52 PM
Your sweet baby boy is in so many hearts right now and so are you and your family kelly. I think of you- a seemingly perfect stranger... throughout my day . My heart aches for you and i hope that some smiles came to your day today.

xoxo
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Jackie McFeatersApril 21, 2010 at 3:23 AM
I love you Kel and love reading your letters to Ethan. He was so very lucky to have you for a mommy and he loved you sooo much! I am always here for you and I love you! Love, Aunt Jackie
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EvonneApril 21, 2010 at 7:15 AM
My heart breaks for you. Even though I never had the pleasure of meeting Ethan, I know he was, and always will be, a beautiful boy. Ethan has touched so many hearts, mine included. Every time I wear my Crosby jersey, I think of Ethan and say a few silent words for him and you.
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What is Neuroblastoma?

Overview
Neuroblastoma is a malignant (cancerous) tumor that develops from nerve tissue. It occurs in infants and children.
Symptoms
The first symptoms are usually fever, a general sick feeling (malaise), and pain. There may also be loss of appetite, weight loss, and diarrhea.
Other symptoms depend on the site of the tumor, and may include:
Bone pain or tenderness (if the cancer spreads to the bones)
Difficulty breathing or a chronic cough (if the cancer spreads to the chest)
Enlarged abdomen (from a large tumor or excess fluid)
Flushed, red skin
Pale skin and bluish color around the eyes
Profuse sweating
Rapid pulse (tachycardia)
Brain and nervous system problems may include:
Inability to empty the bladder
Loss of movement (paralysis) of the hips, legs, or feet (lower extremities)
Problems with balance
Uncontrolled eye movements or leg and feet movements (called opsoclonus-myoconus syndrome, or "dancing eyes and dancing feet")
Treatment
Treatment varies depending on the location of the tumor, how much and where the tumor has spread, and the age of the patient. In certain cases, surgery alone is enough, but often other therapies are needed. Anticancer medications (chemotherapy) may be recommended if the tumor is widespread. Radiation therapy may also be used.
Causes
Neuroblastoma can occur in many areas of the body. It develops from the tissues that form the sympathetic nervous system (the part of the nervous system that controls body functions, such as heart rate and blood pressure, digestion, and levels of certain hormones).
Most neuroblastomas begin in the abdomen in the adrenal gland or next to the spinal cord, or in the chest. They may also start in other areas. Neuroblastomas can spread to the bones (face, skull, pelvis, shoulders, arms, and legs), bone marrow, liver, lymph nodes, skin, and around the eyes (orbits).
The cause of the tumor is unknown. Neuroblastoma is most commonly diagnosed in children before age 5. The disorder occurs in approximately 1 out of 100,000 children and is slightly more common in boys.
In most patients, the neuroblastoma has already spread when it is first diagnosed.
Tests & diagnosis
Signs vary depending on the location of the tumor. Examination of the abdomen with the hands (palpation) may reveal a mass. The liver may be enlarged, if the tumor has spread to the liver. Adrenal gland tumors can cause high blood pressure and a fast heart rate. Lymph nodes may be swollen.
X-ray or imaging tests are done to locate the main (primary) tumor and to see where it has spread. These include:
Bone scan
Bone x-rays
Chest x-ray
CT scan of chest and abdomen
MRI scan of chest and abdomen
Other tests include:
Biopsy of tumor
Bone marrow biopsy
CBC showing anemia or other abnormality
Coagulation studies, erythrocyte sedimentation rate
Hormone tests (blood tests to check levels of hormones such as epinephrine and other catecholamines)
MIBG scan
Urine 24-hour test for catecholamines, homovanillic acid (HVA) and vanillymandelic acid (VMA)
Prognosis
The expected outcome varies. In very young children with neuroblastoma, the tumor may go away on its own, without any treatment, or the tissues of the tumor may mature and develop into a benign (non-cancerous) tumor called a ganglioneuroma, which can be surgically removed. In other cases, the tumor spreads rapidly.
Response to treatment also varies. Treatment is often successful if the cancer has not spread, but if it has been spread, neuroblastoma is much harder to cure. Younger children often do better than older children.
Tumors with certain genetic characteristics may be harder to cure.
Children treated for neuroblastoma may be at risk for getting a second, different cancer in the future.
Complications
Spread (metastasis) of the tumor
Damage and loss of function of involved organ(s)
Kidney failure
Liver failure
Loss of blood cells produced by the bone marrow
Decreased resistance to infection
Other organ system failures

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I miss you, someday we will be together again~~~

4 comments:

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